one year

So princess is two years old now. And life is like that... today we remember something completely diffrent.

It is one year since my father passed away.
On 31 of May we went to the doctor together and he heard the verdict that he had breastcancer. The doctor said he wanted to operate (papa was 84 then), but that he had "to cut deep to be sure". He took it bravely, but i knew how he felt.
We made appointments for the next week and left.
In the hall of the hospital we talked for almost one hour, planning how to tell mama.
We dwelled through all the possibilities, both frightened for the future.Both holding each other...
He walked me out when i left. We hugged and kissed goodnight like usual. Through the front screen i put my thumb up as a sign that everything will be okay. He pulled up his shoulders and smiled: "I don't know, girl"

His best friend convinced him to play brigde that evening (my father was a great bridgeplayer, pride of his club). My father's friend lost his wife one year before due to breastcancer,so he said that it would give him some distraction. And so they could talk a while...

That night papa ji had a bleeding in the brain...A massive bleeding...
I think sometimes he made some negotiations with God: "Please give me another death, something quick and not painful."
And God gave it to him.

While he was drifting into a coma, bridge was still in his mind and he said to mama:
"Let's play hearts"
That were his last words.

Yes we do, daddy, we play hearts. We always will.
For you.